Posted in Life

i miss water colours. i miss the old me.


hope that may ends as quick as possibble. haha.

i miss my colouring book. water colours. sketching melagha mengarut. hopefully after eid can start doing this! eheh.

post cholecystectomy has occupied my everyday to do list. more visits to the toilet. It had been few months, and this month is the worst. haiyaa. it seems my body cant tolerate even with the slightest oil intake (will b resultg very painful stomachache yang hadoiii). oh tedah me. N aggravated by painful inflammation at below rib (somewhere at upper abdominal). Just make it worse. Now, taking meds for few days before upcoming apptmnt. ahah. gratefully, i still can eat! hehe. So, right now, im staying in my room (not planning to come to the office as the tummy went against me most of the time lately), felt more convenient to lay down or sit sesuka hati everytime rs sakit. i came to believe tht health is as equal as important as money. cayaklah. i miss the old me whom can eat without restrictions (but still i bersyukur for wht is left).

i will b staying in batu pahat/pagoh tis coming july/aug (not sure..but the earliest wld be by end of jun) until end of year barangkali, that depends. ahah. semoga semuanya lancar, amiin..Look forward to mix around and make new frens. hehe. personally, i dont like to stay put at one is always what i look forward to..jumping places here and there and honestly, i dont get tired of it. ahah. i guess that life had to be full of adventures (up to wht kind of living thrilled you lah), as for me, i dont like to settle down at one place too long. haha. kinda weird! but weirdos will catch up with bunch of weirdos (and definitely my man pun haf to adapt with my freak living habit). So, basically im living with clueless direction (or often claimed as keep going aje), until the end of me.  for sure, i will leave jb once im done with phd. i had one bad habit, where i dont like to kept my circle as it is. hoho. i did this several times, after completn of my first dgree (i kept 5nums behind, the rest i hd deleted). after resignatn at sabah (i only kept 3nums behind, hahaha), after master dgree (being generous, i didnt even save nums except for 3 of my frens, my supervisor n co sv haha, so i wont felt guilt later), then, i sambung phd (and tht wasnt a part of my life plan, without expecting tht my life had became so retard in the phd level haha!). Good news is, i still kept all nums except for few immature monkeys hahaha…(or unknowns). =)

Okay, cut the crap out, get back to work! hehe.

p/s: nunggu kad debit bank rakyat to buy books. ahaha. bjanggut la.=DD



Posted in Life

The incompetent person perspectives


True love has no bullshits in it (but we hardly classify or define true love).

Build by trust and sincerity.

Showered with love and understanding.

Blessed by Allah n parents n kawan2.

Most importantly, it brings out the best of you and it makes you feel theres nothing else to look in others. Senang cerita wen u look at him, ur heart says ah! He’s the one.

The heart will greatly compromised with the brain. The heart will eventually leave everythg to God’s hand. Jadi or sik jadi, thats beyond our control. But the heart will always look on the positive sides of loving the person u love. Love hurts, yes, but loving made yr days more meaningful. Overthinking is normal. Thats how love grow. But again, let the brain and heart compromise. Its always better to have these two worked together.

Love dont cost u anything until a heartbreak. Until u found out how deep is yr love, haaa…time ya begegar dunia you you..I guess that breakup period (or frustration) is not a friendly behaviour to me. I tend to isolate myself for weeks, doing crazy thing (for instace, irit kawan doing crazy thing together, kesian the girls kdg2)😂😂, and shopping or makan tmpt mahal2 sesuka hati akal fikiran.thats nafs wokey (so blame the hormones n devils). Grrr

And we dont simply love a person witht judging and comparing. Whatever comparisons u did, keep it personal between u and Allah. Theres more of him/her are yet to be found. Jadi, initial judgment shud b at minimal unless u already know each other for a long time ya lain cerita hokeng. In fact, finding the right person shud be called as the terrible-intresting journey of life.

And lastly he is not yours until the akad. No matter who he is to everyone else, he is simply a baby guy tht drives u crazy crazy all the time and when u smiles a lot (alone) and also praying for him (personally i think this is the feeling u get when he is constantly in yr prayers). Theres nothing wrong with falling in love, but loving him/her in plenty wrong ways will turn it to bountiful of bullshits.agree?

Ok thats quite well done.

p/s: ok bye, he’s hot, im a chickpea, thus, love hurts.eheheh.

Posted in Life

Happy Birthday Amiera


Her birthday was 5 days ago. A late post this year. The trip to melaka on early feb was an early birthday celebration for her (sbb i balit kuch for post lap-chole on the following week). So, i brought my squad to UTHM and Melaka, vroommmm…=))

At this age, there will be no more cake, tiup lilin so on (as she prefers nasi lauk duduk bersila rather than cake on her birthday, in fact, she’s not really into sweet stuffs and things, yes, she didnt). So, we had our breakfast, lunch, & dinner at places where we ate more nasi & lauk.

I doakan you, our dearie amiera, to stay healty, sabr, and success in yr path. Thank u for being a good company. May your days onwards wll be fulfill with blessings and kasih sayang Allah.



Posted in Life

Celebrating page 30 over 365, in 2017


Hi there.

I’ve been struggling within these few days with myself. Ahah, and finally, happy independence day to me!!!!!hoorayyyy….!


I shud stop being upset with my past isnt it?. I understand that i ws the problem. Because i trust, believed, hope, and loved too much. And akhirnya, ive suffered soooo much. There is nothing wrong with the person i loved. More to say, he is now happy (beranak pinak). Honestly, I somehow felt a little bit jealous looking at his small family. Terfikir how he did that? Moving on? (He did so well, probably, he wasn’t in love wth me at all) and i kept myself in the darkness for sooo long (I was so stupid hahah). Because i trust, believed, hope, and loved too much, and in the end, ive suffered soooo much. Today onwards, I’m keeping the space empty for my beloved husband only. No such thing as “relationship” between man – woman will do before nikah. I’ve learnt two things from him, one, he is not good for me. Two, Allah has written for me the most beautiful story. One day, i will tell my man, how unhappy my pasts were (and he will listen to me and share the thought) and how grateful i am to have him around (because he can fix the broken and unwanted me). *insert smiley here*


Mr. Jackman looking so hot with his so called adamantium skeleton, hihi

I personally believed in, “Not Everyone Can Heal as Quick as Wolverine”. Some ppl will take years, some don’ts. They need space. I guess, the hard-to-forget type of person, is the one that loves harder. So, be grateful if you’ve had already found one.

Technology took everything away from us, even now, “I love you” became worthless. Be careful.

ya kah? hmm~~~~~

p/s: terjumpa my sooo called “true love” haktuihh last week d kedey makan, ahaks, what a small world (wht a coincidence, haihhhh, mngucap pjg balit makan hahah). ahrgh btw, regards to the pasts for being terribly complicated thru out the mischievous journey in my twenties. Al-fatihah to the old rotten heart, as I’m changing it to a new one (literally lah). Good luck princess!

Posted in Info, Life

My lazy menu for few weeks 


I dont fancy food selfies, so here r the best 2 among plenty of mskn ive done since ad chiller bru (plus i cudnt simply eat anytg nowadays). 😉

Tadaaaa….(fireworks), Meet my ayam stim marinated with everythg, practically. Please dont be scared of tht huge cut of brclli. I enjoyed eating those in big pieces sebenanya. Oh btw, this is the easiest, lazy, n common meal ive prepared fr myself for dinner n lunch. Normally, i cudnt habiskan this portion at one time, so, i brought the remaing half for tomorrow’s lunch at ofc. Saving sgt youu youu. And xbasi at all.

The chicken ws basically “groomed” with oyster sauce, chili sauce, ginger, onion, garlic, lemongrass, green apple (optional), and sometimes i add potatoes, red chili, and soy sauce. Crushed potatoes (normally i took quarter size) also gives incredible taste to the broth (meshy2 gtew) n it helps to replace yr rice intake. So for those whom interested in a free-rice-meal or better say acah2-on-a-diet can give a try.

Steam fish also among my fav dish n yes, ive “groomed” them in various styles just like my ayam. But dont just go n mix everytg as for fish, theyre bit smelly n sensitive to certain ingredients. Lemon or limau CNY can be utilized  besides ginger. Hehe. Soy sauce taste bttr with fish. Garlic n onion as well. Spices like white n black peppers can fit in but not too much. It will spoil yr fish. Oyster sauce is not advisable, but ive already give it a try, not bad bro~..sedap juak, just jgn byk.Pineapple pun boleh tmbh tepi. Eceh.n make sure to buy fresh fish otherwise kurang mnyelerakan later.

Just a piece of advice.

Cook from yr heart. Ikhlas.

Umi pesan, nak masak, masak sedap  sedap. Buat betul2. Jgn marah2, nnt mknn xsedap.

Definitely true, i believed tht bcos mmg xsedap aie. Foods have feelings too rupanya. Sooo, hf to ikhlas.

Oh i almost frgt, please dont over do yr dishes, make it sederhana, especially when it comes to improvisation.Will def share more n more of cooking stuffs here.

p/s: Baby step learner, hari raya kitchen helper, and sincerely not a professional cooks, perhaps 1day , who knows??😜 like an old saying, PRACTICE MAKES PERFECT. good luck!

Posted in Life

Starfish Ninja


Been so bz with night classes, but still keen to update eventho mata dah kelat at this hour. N yes im still in my jeans, btudung, posing like a dead starfish on the floor. Plus, humming the i will survive song, sambil editing the post. Okay ya jk.



p/s: im a fighter! And best of luck to all fighters! May Allah ease everything fr u!

Posted in Life

games games games (oh what im doing here??!) 


It was deadly fun inside here!!.why i dah besar tua baruk tauk.??  No wonder kedey games were the best place for most teenagers after school (thts y karangan bm during our school time ada, “gejala2 sosial dalam kalangan pelajar sekolah”). Now i know y, but please dont look for soulmate here (only wen i experienced the madness in some of these games, i fnd myself – just like the younger me where i laughed mcm kak limah, shout wen i missed the target, my voice, i think it went to the top of the roof..hadoih).

I was abnormal for 2 hours with the other 2 stooges (my sibbies)..amer was bz with his basketball ring, claimed tht it ws gd for his muscles (hmm, nyalah ya..thenafter, he kept saying lelah eh, sakit eh, haha, my amer). N Dek snh go racing in her fav myvi driving posture “50cm from steering”. She cracked me up during the entire sesh hahaha!!, my dearie gollum. The pirate ship was the best; amplified by movable base, super shooting sound (rasa mok pekak n bggar jantung), plus me, the crazy woman inside!hahaha..

The decent photo (up) was the ‘aftermath’. Looking happy n stress released! (wpun tudung senget sikit). I Shud bring the girls here n let them scream too..😂😂😂

P/s: approx. a month bfr lap chole. Now i need to slow down a bit on sport, the body needs time to rcvr, time.yes, time.